About cbt0

Philosopher, inventor, writer, student of behavior, aficionado of physics, very amateur astronomy, terrible poet, businessman. Also enjoy eating, traveling, and flying. Did I mention eating?

Hate, the book: 063

Hello Curious Friend.  Welcome to my book about Hate.  The number tells you where you are in the sequence.  I look forward to your comments.

Part Two
Chapter Twelve
Four Myths  (Continued)

Stopping it sounds good. But like real stop signs, most people just roll through it.

Does this scenario seem far-fetched?  It shouldn’t.  It happens today all over the world, including in so-called civilized nations like the USA.

Whether it’s issues between religious fundamentalists and less religious free-thinkers, or between people with different backgrounds, the world is replete with these kinds of conflicts.

And the result of these conflicts is the same.

Something about the other clan is detested.  Your clan believes the other clan threatens you in some way.  Therefore you are warned to stay away from them.

Anyway, let’s return back to that lazy stream, where you met the man of your dreams.
Before you fell in love with him, let’s say you discovered he wore a green stripe.  What then would have happened?

Because you’d been so deeply conditioned by your parents to fear and loathe anyone from the green tribe, you would have run away.

In this case hate helped you make a life choice; a choice that your clan believes helps you, and them, survive.  In their eyes, if you had not been taught to hate the greens and had still fallen in love with that green-striped boy, you would have met with disaster.

Has hate ever been taught to truly ensure survival?  This is likely.  However, since it’s clear there are exceptions to the idea that hate stemmed as a survival mechanism, it must be classified as myth.

Does your culture continue teaching hate?  Did you grow up in a household where some group was painted with a broad brush?

Hate is your culture’s way of saying, “Don’t associate with those people because they will make all of us worse off.  Hate them now, so that we will be more successful later.”

What are my sources of this myth?  I can say that from personal experience, and from direct reports from close friends as a child, that our parents and grandparents were quick to fill our spongy minds with negative stories about other people.  These others were to be avoided unless we wanted to risk harm.

We were taught to hate.  I am confident that as I was taught, so to were these elders who tried to convince us to hate others.  In this way, seeds of hate are sown for generations.

Myth Three: Hate originated as a Tool to Control Others

Could hate have originated as a tool for one group to affect the actions of another? It’s possible, but by no means provable.

It’s common knowledge that some people use whatever tools are at their disposal to sway the minds of other men.

Take political advertising in the USA.  During their elections, there are a large number of radio, television and radio ads using hate as a theme.

The message of all of these kinds of ads is the same; “Hate my opponent. Vote for me!”

It’s been known for a long time that hate ads work.  They are effective because they touch a deep chord within our psyche.  Why they work so well isn’t for discussion here. The fact is they work.

To be continued …

Hate, the book: 062

Hello Curious Friend.  Welcome to my book about Hate.  The number tells you where you are in the sequence.  I look forward to your comments.

Part Two
Chapter Twelve
Four Myths  (Continued)

Stopping it sounds good. But like real stop signs, most people just roll through it.

Two intellectual giants believe otherwise.  The first is no less than Charles Darwin.  As quoted before in his book on emotions, he notes that hate often comes from fear.  And in a more modern vein, and written about most eloquently, are the more biochemical and neurobiological paths espoused by Rush Dozier in his books, “Why We Hate,” and “The Nature of Hate.” He agrees with Darwin, saying hate stems from fear.

These gentlemen are extremely intelligent.  One cannot push their views aside lightly.  Nevertheless, I stand on our standard of truth that the presence of even a single exception to their assertions about fear and hate should be enough to at least create a shred of doubt in your mind.

And since doubt has been established, the idea that fear always leads to hate is a myth.

Myth Two: Hate Started as a Survival Tactic

Let’s use our imagination to show why hate could be used to help our tribe survive.
You’re young, a child in a primitive tribe.  Your parents warn you about that “other” tribe. Let’s say the other tribe usually wears green stripes on their sleeves.

Your tribe wears blue stripes.  And as long as you can remember you are warned that anyone wearing that dreaded green stripe is to be detested and avoided.
Is this a bad thing?  Let’s see.

Now, back to our tribe. At this point, you’re older. In fact, you’re a beautiful young woman who is ready to embrace love.
One day, by the banks of a lazy stream, a handsome, shirtless young man steals your heart. His soft voice and gentle demeanor are all you can think about between the days you meet in secret.

You’re in love with him.

He, too, is struck dumb with love, and together you know the universe revolves around you both.  Nothing else matters to either of you.

And then the day comes when you find out the terrible truth.  He wears the green stripe. He’s green.  You’re blue.  You have both been cultured to detest each other on sight.  What happens now?

Our modern romantic world would have you both skipping off into the sunset, with each other’s families acting antagonistically towards the two of you.  Of course, in this fairy tale both of your families would come around and eventually your tribes would join hands in peace and brotherhood.

In reality, it’s likely there will be significant cultural barriers between your two tribes that will prevent such a happy ending.  Perhaps his tribe has beliefs about domestic life that are much different than yours.

They may, for example, believe women primarily exist to bear male babies.  As the wife of a green tribesman, you may find yourself cast out into the wilderness if you can’t have a child.

Let’s say your tribe has a completely different take on domestic life.  They may feel that women and men are equals.  That raising children of all genders is a privilege, not a requirement.  Their commitment to each other is to create a loving family, not a harem or baby factory.

To be continued …

Hate, the book: 061

Hello Curious Friend.  Welcome to my book about Hate.  The number tells you where you are in the sequence.  I look forward to your comments.

Part Two
Chapter Twelve
Four Myths  (Continued)

Stopping it sounds good. But like real stop signs, most people just roll through it.

Myth One: Fear is the Cause of Hate

For something to be true, really true, it has to be right all the time.  Every time.  Not some of the time.

If I can find a single instance where a “truism” isn’t true, then it’s not a truism.  It’s a myth.  I stated this at the beginning of this chapter, and I’m restating it here because this one is the oldest myth out there.

Just because a myth has been accepted as fact for centuries doesn’t mean it’s not a myth, regardless of what intellectual giant claimed it as fact.  If there’s no way to test it, if there’s a single piece of contradictory evidence against it, it’s a myth.

This can’t be overstated: For something to be true, it has to be true all the time.

Yes, something that falls short of this strict definition can still be useful.  It can serve as a general guideline.  You can say that it’s statistically significant to a certain degree.  You can even say it has a probability of something or other.

But these are all fancy words that cover our collective butts to hide the fact we don’t truly know something.  If we don’t know, we don’t know.  And in this book, if something isn’t known, we’re going to be brave enough to say these three simple words: “I don’t know.”

So, when investigating the issue of whether fear results in hate, I’ve done my job in proving this assertion is a myth if I can find a single instance to the contrary.

The point is we can’t prove that fear always causes hate.  It’s a good story and it might well be true.

But at this time it’s simply not provable.  Therefore it’s a myth.

There’s another reason this is a myth.  Fear is a primary emotion.  In fact, one could argue it’s the first emotion, exhibited even today by single celled creatures avoiding danger in their environment.

We can say, “Amoeba is afraid of salt water!”  We can say this because it’s true, an amoeba can’t live in salt water, a fact verified by studying the amoeba under a microscope.

Another consideration is that since fear is an ancient emotion, maybe the oldest emotion there is, then every animal in existence must have the capacity to feel fear as a survival mechanism.

If fear results in hate, then it follows that every animal in existence must also exhibit hate.

Of course this is not true.  Other than man, no species consistently exhibits hate: no bug, no worm, nor even something as highly evolved as an elephant.

One might argue that higher primates have shown hate, but these behaviors can also be explained as selective reproduction tactics.

That’s beside the point. Only man can be definitively said to exhibit hate.

So we’ve seen that fear doesn’t always lead to hate for the simple fact that all creatures have the capacity for fear, yet do not hate, with the exception of man.

That fact in and of itself proves fear doesn’t always cause hate.

To be continued …

Hate, the book: 060

Hello Curious Friend.  Welcome to my book about Hate.  The number tells you where you are in the sequence.  I look forward to your comments.

Part Two
Chapter Twelve
Four Myths

Stopping it sounds good. But like real stop signs, most people just roll through it.

“Primitive, violent hatred has its roots in the most ancient areas of the brain. It is part of our reptomammalian nature that first evolved in the bleak kill-or-be-killed environment of millions of years ago.”
Rush Dozier, “Why we hate” pg 66

Where does hate come from? I mean, originally?  Like the first time it ever appeared on our planet?  We may never know.  However, there are stories that may give us some insights as to the origins of hate.

Why do I call them stories?  Why not glorify these thoughts by calling them theories or hypotheses?

Because a theory or hypothesis must live and die by very strict rules.  A theory must adequately describe and predict its subject.  And the hypothesis must be testable.
This is not a requirement for stories.  A story is something that sounds good, holds our interest, and does not need to be tested.  It doesn’t need to be rigorously vetted, nor accurate.

It doesn’t even need to make sense!  A story’s job is simply to hold our interest long enough for us to say, “Hmm, isn’t that interesting?”

A story that deals with the origin of something is a special kind of story, a myth.  Myths may or may not be true.

Take the ancient Greek myth of Paris, Helen of Troy and the Trojan War.  Long before the ancient city of Troy was unearthed in Turkey, many children learned of this myth, which begins with Paris’ abduction of the beautiful Helen.
According to the myth, that abduction led to the Trojan War.  No doubt, many generations over the years Troy was made up.  But was it? There was no proof for many years.

But today there is proof that Troy existed, thanks to one intrepid young archeologist who looked past the myth and spent years digging in remote areas of Turkey to find remnants of this ancient city.

His tenacity to look beneath a myth’s face value revealed that the existence of Troy was real.  That’s the kind of tenacity we’ll need to determine the origin of hate; something factual, testable.

It may be that some of what we’ll discuss here contains a shred of truth, but it will remain for someone more persistent than me to show whether it has anything to do with the origins of hate.

I don’t have the time, or the tools, to conduct such research.  That’s what this book is all about, creating tools others can use to unravel the mysteries of hate.

So where did I find these myths on the origins of hate?

You won’t find them listed in Edith Hamilton’s “Mythology” or any other single work.  I had to piece them together from many sources, including scholarly papers, books and my own experiences.

The result are numerous stories, within which may be some insight, some lessons we can take with us about the origins of hate.  At first glance we may be tempted to accept them as evidence.

Yet as you will see they remain myths because they are not provable, nor testable. With all that in mind, let’s dip into the possible beginnings of this most potent emotion.

To be continued …

Hate, the book: 059

Hello Curious Friend.  Welcome to my book about Hate.  The number tells you where you are in the sequence.  I look forward to your comments.

Part Two
Chapter Eleven
Hate Is Not  (Continued)

Stopping it sounds good. But like real stop signs, most people just roll through it.

But just because someone becomes unhappy doesn’t mean you wanted them to be unhappy.  It’s very unlikely anyone gets married thinking that they want to make their partner miserable.

Therefore, even in the ugliest of marriages, hate did not initially exist, only love.

Now, in the case of a nasty divorce, it’s very possible that one or both parties become hateful.  That is, they do their best to ensure the other party is hurt, and they go out of their way to inflict unhappiness.

In this case hate has emerged.  But just because it appears doesn’t mean it can be confused with love.  Our attitudes can change, our desires for that other person can change, and this is what brings so much hate into the world.

A recent example of how our society continues to confuse love and hate can be seen in a popular book called “Shades of Gray.”  It’s a romance novel about a sadistic relationship between a dominating man and a submissive woman who becomes his sex slave.  The story has great appeal among women.  We won’t deal with why women are so intrigued by it here.  What we will discuss is how confused most readers seem to be about the protagonist’s actions.

Many readers see his actions as a form of love ritual.  After all, he devotes much of his valuable time and energy to the welfare of his sex slave.  He lavishes her with expensive gifts.  And they do enjoy some romantic times together.

The woman enjoys these gifts, these attentions, and their romance.  She particularly enjoys having her body manipulated and stimulated, as it provides her with sexual satisfaction.

On the surface, our dominator and his slave appear to be having a loving relationship. They spend quality time together, they seem devoted to each other, and they enjoy physical intimacy and sexual ecstasy.

He takes care of her.  He makes her feel good.  He makes her feel, “safe.”

She loves him.  And she thinks he loves her.

But this isn’t the case.  In fact he hates her.

That he hates her is demonstrated by his actions.  He likes humiliating her.  He purposely causes her physical pain.  He clearly enjoys inflicting psychological damage on her.  And it’s obvious he has no concern about her welfare.

He’s simply using her to gratify his desires.  All he wants from her is physical satisfaction, and the feeling of power he gets from dominating her.

Worse, her acceptance of his actions reinforces her into believing that the way he treats her is normal.  This belief adds to his control over her and the pleasure he derives from that control.

That she enjoys this twisted relationship and believes she loves him is of no consequence.

Bottom line is the sex slave loves her dominator.  The dominator hates his slave.  It’s that simple.  There is no confusion here.  One only has to look beneath the surface of the situation to see the facts.

Fundamentally, to hate someone means you want that person to be worse off, unhappy, and to that end you may well go out of your way to make that happen.

That was clearly the case with the protagonist in “Shades of Gray.”

So hate isn’t something to be confused with love.  It doesn’t reside in our chemistry or biology.  And with all due respect to Darwin, hate is not an extension of fear.

Now that we’ve covered the three things hate is not, let’s start tackling the question of what goes into hate.  The best way to start understanding anything is to start at the very beginning.

To be continued …