My Haunted House

There’s an apparition in my house, the scariest you can imagine.

It taunts me whenever it can.  It always looks me in the eye, and reminds me that I’m rather ugly, that I’m untidy.  Worse, it keeps telling me that I’m getting old, older, oldest.  If I look away, it reminds me that I’m getting flabby, or gray, or worse.

It only appears in certain rooms, so I tend to avoid those rooms.  It only speaks when there’s sufficient light, so I have no problem keeping my house dark.

Full disclosure here, I’m not a vampire.

I don’t play one as an actor, and I’m pretty sure I don’t sleep-vamp.  I’m also good with sunlight, even though I prefer moonlight.  Topping it off, I’m totally ok with garlic.  I love garlic.

You see, my house doesn’t have many mirrors.  Sure, there’s one in the bathroom.  But it’s only there to make sure I don’t slice off my nose while shaving, or that I’ve scraped my tongue correctly.  That’s about it.

I’m convinced that the mirror is one of the greatest sources of life’s stress.  Every time I peer into my own eyes, I can only see what’s wrong, and what’s going wrong, and what can go wrong.

I’ve heard of people who become so worried, so stressed out while looking in the mirror, they spend HOURS peering into its seductive message.  I’m pretty sure none of those people are truly happy.

What was it like before?  You know, before there were mirrors everywhere?  I have a feeling people were a bit messier, but also happier.  First of all, your friends would get your face in shape, so that’s social.  And you wouldn’t spend all that alone time faced with your greatest fear.

Death.

Because that’s what your mirror delivers.  You’re looking into a cold, glassy surface that  reflects your own image back into your eyeballs.  Your hopes, your dreams, your accomplishments aren’t there.  Only you.  Just like when you’re lying there in a coffin, unable to move, with all your friends and a few enemies coming to pay their last respects.

You’re cold, and stiff.  You might as well be made of glass.

So the next time you glance at yourself in your favorite mirror, give yourself a big smile.

It may be your last.

Happy Halloween

 

Bad Sex

Alright guys, another article that’s not what you think.

This is inspired by a woman named Germaine Greer.  What she says is thought provoking.  And since I like provoking thoughts, I’m going to repeat her words.

Rape is bad sex.

She’s written a book about it, but the summary is simple.  Lets stop treating rape as a hugely incredibly terrible event that puts ALL the responsibility upon the victim instead of the perpetrator.  Instead of having this ridiculous standard of proof, lets lower that standard, and lower the penalty.  You raped someone?  Pay the fine.  Make it a big fine.

Was there injury involved?  Then the fine is increased.

Did she say no?  Or was she incapacitated on her own?  Then even more fine.

Did YOU incapacitate her?  Increase the fine yet again.

Get the picture?  It’s like a speeding ticket.  Break it down into its respective components and penalize each of them.  Faster justice.  More impact upon the perps.  Easier to prove.

Are these thoughts controversial?   Oh yes.

Is there a right and a wrong here?  Absolutely not.

I’m not a proponent of following them.  However, I’m a big fan of discussing them.  Unless we start tackling all of our social problems head on in rational manners, we’re not going to be going anywhere.  If anything, we are slipping backwards.

So, consider the words, ponder the thoughts, and think through what we’re trying to achieve as a society.  There has to be a solution in there, somewhere.

Or else…

 

Vaccinate Your Daughters

Medical science has proven that we can teach our immune system how to deal with a nasty bug BEFORE the real bug infects us.

This saves MILLIONS of lives every year.  It’s one of the reasons so many people are on Earth today.

... and against the bogie man.

There is another kind of vaccination we can get, and it doesn’t involve a needle, only words.

It’s a psychological vaccination, and this sort of thing has been known for centuries.

And you can do it yourself.  Here’s how.

First, think of the bad thing you want to teach your kids about, like a house fire.

Then talk about it.  Act it out.  Use pictures if your child is small, or go visit a fire station and talk to a firefighter if they like field trips.  The whole point of the exercise is that you are preparing your child for an event that you hope never happens.

Except it does, all too often.

There is lots of proof that the people who have been “inoculated” for a particular emergency do better than those that aren’t prepared.

People who aren’t prepared tend to have more injuries, suffer more in the long term, and are more likely to perish.

What about our daughters?

There’s a kind of emergency that happens to them far more often than it happens to boys.  There are “emergencies” that they can experience even as young women, whether they are on a date, in university, or trying to get a better job within their company.

It’s time to start creating a program that teaches our young ladies, ahead of time, what to do when they come up against harassment, exploitation, and glass ceilings.  It’s time to give them options now, before they are surprised.

We’re talking about reducing pain, enhancing recovery, and improving their survival.

Aren’t they worth it?  Yes, they are.  So, mothers, dads, relatives, prepare your psychological syringes and get to work.

It’s time to play doctor – for real.

 

Pride in Kidlessness

I met this guy at a party, and he was boasting that soon after getting married he’d gotten a vasectomy.  His newlywed wife was all for it.  And they’d been married happily for many years.

But aren't they toooooo cute?

They are smart, well-traveled, fairly funny, and have a good life.  Why not want to share that with some little copies of themselves?

Here’s a few easy reasons.

  1. Perhaps one or both had a rough childhood, and don’t want to pass on those bad memories.
  2. Perhaps they are surrounded by enough children owned by relatives, they feel safe not contributing to the family.
  3. They could be so selfish that the idea of sharing any of their fun times with anyone else is abhorrent.  Why choose to share it with someone you are legally liable for?

I’m sure you can think of a few more, but the other day I realized there was a big one that I hadn’t considered.  It is very similar to thoughts I shared regarding suicide some time ago.

It goes like this:

This couple isn’t happy with the world as they know it.  There’s pollution, overcrowding, uncertainty, and increasing expenses.

They Choose No Children because they are afraid of the future.  The joy they might feel in raising a child is offset by the pain of exposing them to a frightening world.

In a way, we are seeing a form of species suicide.  For if the members don’t have enough children, the species will shrink.  Shrink enough and it dies.

So the next time you meet a couple that is childless, try to cheer them up.  The future can’t be that bad.

Can it?

 

 

The “Other” Other Woman

Image

The other day my super politically reactionary cousin was defending Herr Drumpf as being a good example of a leader and gentleman.

You are.

 

I do my best to stay calm and level headed, so I asked what she thought about all the women who have come out and made statements about things that he has done to them?  Most of the things he’s alleged to have done were unwanted harrassment.

But there were also quite a few women who attested that they were quite happy “Doing the Dude” for any number of reasons.

My cousin’s reaction?

“They are all lying.  Women will do or say anything to get attention, especially at the expense of a famous man.”

This caught me by surprise.  There have been, and still are, quite a few famous men that don’t have a dozen women chasing them around with sexual allegations.

There also have been, and still are, quite a few women who generally tell the truth.

There also have been, and still are, quite a few men who are well known to make a habit of preying on women.

Finally, there is absolute evidence that Der Drumpf has cheated on his previous wives, evidence that was presented in divorce court.

So what’s the deal with my cousin?

I figured it out the other day, and here’s an article that helps lead us in the right direction.

It must have happened to her.

The only way my cousin would discount ALL women as liars, is if she has to believe that ONE women in particular, is also a liar.

Who is that woman?

Someone who threatened to come between her and her husband.

In order to save her own peace of mind, my cousin had to consider that “other” woman as a liar.  That means her husband was still faithful to herself, and that means that her marriage is sound.

It also means that my cousin has become the other other woman.  For it is she who is fooling herself about a relationship that no longer exists.

It also means that, of all the other women out there who stand by His Hole-ness for all his alleged sexual exploits, there’s a chance they are reacting like my cousin for similar reasons.

Is it possible that there is such a large population of “other” other women?

What do you think?