Battle of the Sexes

Yesterday I talked about how messy Mother Nature really is.

To sum up Her methods, she throws a lot of things together and sees how they fare in the “real world.”*

It doesn’t matter if we’re talking about species like the platypus, or making natural soap.  The outcome is messy, and as humans we don’t understand everything she does.  After all, we’re only human.

Speaking of humans, we are also a product of Mother Nature.  And therefore, we must also be a mess.

Here’s where the fun starts.  Ask a typical woman what she thinks of men, and she will tell you that, as a class, they are pretty much messed up.

Ask a typical man the same question, and you’ll probably get the same answer.

We think differently, we experience the world differently, and we remember differently.  As a result, we live together yet apart.  If we find a partner, we grow together, and yet also grow apart.

Let’s talk sex, raw unadulterated baby-making orgasm related sex.  Got your attention?

When humans are young adults, the sex drive goes into hyper mode.  Men think about it all the time.**

Young women think about it somewhat less.  But young women do think about babies.  They are genetically programmed to do this.  Young married women who want a family go into their own hyper mode.  As an old man I’ve been able to talk with some women who are unafraid to tell me their habits.  Sex every day.  Maybe twice a day.

This is a husband’s joy.  For a wife, she is working.  And she’s feeling a bit stressed, because it’s her job to collect that baby-making stuff and turn it into a screaming, teething mass of tissue.  And she’ll do whatever it takes.

Including, if month’s of making babies the old way doesn’t work, going to the doc and checking out the latest technology.

Let’s fast forward a few decades.  The baby has grown and left the nest.  The man is still around, and for the most part, his sex drive is a good fraction of what he had as a youth.

But for the wife, she’s done her job.  The sex drive is probably greatly reduced.  Let’s face it, for many women it may be gone.  For many women, it may never have even been there!  Once the hard work is over, why bother doing something a grotesque and messy as making love?

Here’s where our messy Mother and humanity clash.  For we have been made this way.  We are an experiment.  She has turned our women into beings that live longer, are generally smarter, and more attuned to sustainable living than the male half.

What does this mean for the future of our species?  After all, we left our own nest some 100,000 years ago.  As species go, we are still babies.  Does this sexual dichotomy mean that we are stronger than the dinosaurs?  Or does our declining birth rates mean that our species is doomed?

We didn’t get a chance to talk about natural selection, and that’s where things can get truly interesting.  But I don’t want to bore you, either.  I just wanted to point out that there is a battle between our sexes in the bedroom, and on the stage that Mother Nature has provided.

So, think about that the next time you are “getting some.”

 

 

* Lets be clear here.  Mother Nature, or Mom, always lives in the real world.  It’s us humans that prefer to live in a delusion.  Let me know if you want to hear more.

**  If you don’t think this is true, do your own research.  Just be careful.  Take backup!

 

Messy Messy Mother Nature

My friends,

Consider, if you will, the platypus.

An animal concocted of many parts: bird, turtle, otter, kangaroo, and who knows how many others.

Or take the common ant, available in so many varieties and colors.  Or the banana slug, or jellyfish.

Each in their own right is a thing of beauty, a thing wrought of nature.  A thing that should be the very essence of beauty in the eyes of their queen, or mother, or lover.

For us, they can be an abomination.  How can anyone, or thing, love a spider?

To be a true scientist, especially in biology or behavior, one must accept that all things natural are, in fact, beautiful as well.*

Here’s a fun but seemingly unrelated fact: My company manufactures natural soap.

So what! you say.  What? is this some kind of subliminal advert? you protest.  Your eyes are already getting ready to close this window.  But wait!**

What I’ve learned in making our soap is that the chemical reactions are vastly more complex than we understand.  In fact, what passes for soap in today’s society is a chemical detergent.  Highly engineered chemicals that are extremely efficient at removing oils and water from your skin.

Because they are so efficient, people also buy lotion to try and re-oil and re-moisturize that very skin.

In natural soap, anyone’s natural soap, lotion and lots of other re-moisturizers are already there.  It turns out that Mother Nature makes tens, if not hundreds, of different compounds during the soap making process.

Here’s my point.  When you put together a species, or when you combine natural compounds and make soap, the outcome is not clean and neat.  It’s messy.  Sometimes it works, and sometimes it doesn’t.

Then how does Mother Nature check her own work?  Is there some way that she tests her products for “doneness” in order to make sure her improvements are greater than her mistakes?

Some people don’t think Mother Nature ever tests for improvements, but I think she does.  That’s why life may have started out as one celled plants, but has ultimately peaked with mankind.  If you’re not a fan of man, then maybe you’ll agree the peak was dinosaurs.  No matter. Overall, Mother Nature makes things better.

How she does this, and what it means for you and me, I’ll discuss tomorrow.  For now, I suggest you go and get some natural soap.  It’s good for you.

 

 

 

*We’re going to skip a definition of beauty for now.  If you want an essay on the essence of beauty, and a definition that can cross cultures, clades, and countless centuries, feel free to ask!

**I’m only bringing up the soap bit to make a point.  This is not an advert!  If you want validation of this statement, however, I will provide a hint.  Search for “Uncle Earl’s Soap.”

 

Best Aviation Weather app

Hello everyone,

It’s been a long time since I’ve published any thoughts.  I don’t get the sense that they make much difference.

But a week at Oshkosh for Airventure 2016 has thoroughly rejuvenated me as far as getting excited about life.  Writing?  Maybe not so much.  I’ll focus on making money for now.  But at the moment, there’s something you should know.

As a pilot, one of the most important things we learn is that the weather matters.  This may seem trite, but the fact is that most people, and too many pilots, take weather for granted.

We are content to watch the weather-people tell us what the weather is going to be a few weeks out. Maybe we make some plans based on those predictions, maybe we don’t.

What you may not know is that those predictions come from a whole lot of data that the government collects every day, every minute.  Thousands of balloons are sent high up in the air from all around the world, twice a day.  Radar stations send out about a dozen separate beams at different angles, about once every second.  And every airport, marine port, and many other locations are busy collecting a lot of other weather data continuously.

The government headquarters of the National Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) is in charge of digesting all this data and representing it to us, the general public, commercial customers, and pilots, in forms that we can understand.  The team that works on weather for pilots, for example, only makes predictions out as far as two days – max.

Here’s the fun detail most people don’t realize.  When the weather channel people get the data, they massage it a bit so that it fits their style more comfortably.  Same for your local news station or anyone else for that matter.  One form of that massaging is that your local radar data doesn’t show you a dozen slices of weather – only one.  Another massage is that they stretch out the prediction period from one to two days to almost two weeks!

So if you care about weather, and you want it as pure and clean as organic food, then stop getting it from a processor like your news station.  Go to the source.  Go to NOAA.

Here’s where you can get the app for pilots (sorry, nothing for apple).

     Use this link to spread the word – this is our FREE html web browser version:
     EAsy way to remember – just Google: zoa2  and the first entry will be this webpage for mobile.

Enjoy!

 

 

Enjoying Nature’s Cold Remedy

Achoo!

Yes, I’ve got a humdinger of a head cold.  I never get sick, but a combination of spending two days in court and weeks in preparation and all the other junk that is work have combined to lay me low.

And am I low.  I am just hyped up enough on ibuprofen and ginger tea to write this.

So many have told me to take this, or drink that.  Cold-eze, or vita-C, or whatever.  Each has some kind of magic mixture of minerals, vitamins, and other things to get you better faster.

Bull.  Including red.

Our bodies can do a lot on their own.  After all, how did the old-timers handle these things?  Did they die?

Nope.  We have pretty good records for when people did get colds, and they lived just fine.

As I lay here feeling sorry for myself, I sneezed.  And I realized what the answer is.

Sneezing.  Yes, the lowly sneeze is our cold medicine.

Turns out sneezing is something all mammals do.  Heck, it may be that all animals sneeze, maybe even fish!

The sneeze reflex starts in our nose, detecting invaders.

Then it travels to an ancient part of our brain.  The part that we share with LOTS of other animals.

And we sneeze.  And in sneezing we’re getting rid of those invaders.  Lots of them.

So next time you have a cold, think about sniffing some dust, or pepper.

Why?  Because it’s natural.  It’s cheaper.  And chances are it’ll work better than anything else.

Gesundheit!

PS – Let me know if you want details on the court case.  It’s a doozy!

 

 

Yoga Deconstructed

I had the pleasure of meeting Alexandria Crow the other day and learning about her perspective on yoga.  It was fantastic.

She’s an ex-gymnast and a push-the-envelope kind of person.  She has intimate knowledge of what our bodies are capable of, and what they aren’t.

She knows better than most because she’s suffered.  She went too far.  You’d think that would be bad news.  But it isn’t.

For that’s how the best of the best learn, and we mere mortals must learn from their pain.

Ms. Crow is like a yoga test-pilot.  She took her body to places it shouldn’t go.

She’s learned about what’s out there, the demons who live beyond the envelope.  She lived through the experience, and she’s willing to teach us about it.  We should listen.

As soon as I figured that out, I was riveted.  She wasn’t just another bendy-body beauty, but someone who could give me a deeper insight into my yoga, and yoga in general.

I hadn’t planned on being so captivated.  I thought it would be a nice way to learn some sequencing tips from a seasoned professional.  The fact that she appeared to be twenty-something gave me doubts, but by the end of the session I realized she’d blown my mind.  And not just with respect to sequencing.

For some years I’ve been learning from many different experts, people who have taught, and thought, long and hard about yoga.  I’ve studied a bit of yoga history and about some of the great players in the field.

I’ve only passing interest in the current fads in today’s marketplace.  Mostly because they’re trendy and about establishing brand.  As a business person I can pick up and understand those aspects quickly.

No, the big insight came from combining what I learned from and about Ms Crow, with what I’ve learned from other great yogis I’ve had the pleasure of meeting.

Ginny Nadler has taught me that the hips and deeper are the true center of any pose.  Some independent practitioners and a bit of anthropology agree with her.  Peter Starios taught me that even the innocence of balasana (child’s pose) could be the basis for a rock solid regime.  Yes, he taught me to sweat in child’s pose.  Reading Judith Lasater has taught me that deep and gentle and listening to your body is far more profitable than any standard set of pictures.

Yes there have been others, each of whom has their own particular “angle” on yoga.  But each and everyone had something else: they had broken free of the tyranny of perfect posture.

Ms. Crow calls them fancy poses.  BKS Iyengar made them famous in his book.  Only a professional contortionist can do all of them well.  But I don’t.  I can’t.  I own an old, stiff, anti-athletic body.

But what Sterios, Nadler, Crow and Lasater have done is deconstruct yoga down to its most essential elements – body positions.  And where those body parts should go is indicated by looking at your own body, inside your own body.  Not at someone else’s picture.  Not even the person next to you or at the front of the room.

We don’t have to strive for fancy pose number 9.  We do have to strive to put our hips, feet, and shoulders in the right place.

What makes any place right?  It’s all up to you.  Are you practicing for flexibility? Balance? Strength? Endurance? Coordination? Or something else?  Then that defines where your body goes, how you get there, how long you linger and how hard you push.

Are you warming up for intense forward folds?  Then back off on the updogs!  Need some spinal twists?  Don’t force yourself with external pressures like your arms, legs or ropes.  Let your twist come from inside yourself.  You won’t twist as far, but it’s a better workout, and you’re far less likely to hurt yourself.

Don’t hurt yourself!  It’s fine to feel discomfort that goes away within a day.  But pain lingers and annoys and reduces your quality of life.

I’m a firm believer in this part of the Marine creed: “pain is weakness leaving the body.”  For us civilians, it should read that “discomfort is weakness leaving the body.”

What all these insightful teachers are creating is a new yoga.  Each has taken their bodies to beyond its normal limit, and come back using the power of yoga.

Now they’re teaching us a new way, a more rational, even scientific approach to yoga.  It’s not a trend, yet.  It will never be a fad because it’s too deep.  Right now its leaders are smart, courageous, and working hard.

The results are well worth the effort.  I’m convinced that I’ve avoided hip and knee surgeries that my friends have already had.  My busted shoulder healed faster and better because of yoga.  And I’m certainly a more relaxed person than I would be otherwise.

Yoga means many things.  For me, it’s about harmony.  For Ms. Crow it boiled down to attention.  For our proto-indo european ancestors, it meant “to join.”.

My conclusion from all of these maverick yogis deconstructing today’s yoga is this: they are all closer to the true spirit of yoga’s greatest founders, T. Krishnamacharya.

Krishnamacharya didn’t believe in fancy poses or perfect positions or their names.  His student BKS made many of those up for business purposes.  Krishnamacharya never taught the same way twice, for every student was different.  And he was always learning.

For me, that’s harmony, that paying attention.  And that’s having the ability to join all the different parts of our bodies and lives together in one big practice.

Namaste.

 

Disclaimer: I’m an amateur yogi and only study this as a hobby.  Any mistakes are my own.  Let me know and I’ll fix them as soon as I’m able!

 

 

Body Swap

Are you ready to swap bodies?  For fun?  For profit?

Wait, there’s more!

We’ll swap bodies AND do some time travel at the same time.

But first, let’s set the scene.

In my favorite hardware store the other day.  Stu, one of the owners, was having a semi-political discussion with Pete, a customer.  Stu is incorrigible, irascible, and constantly wearing a snarly face; and that’s on his good days.  Pete is a tall, barrel chested, clean shaven, square jawed, silver-crew cut of a man.  Pete was bemoaning the current state of the economy, government, especially complaining about our “imperial president.”

In his own diplomatic fashion, Stu said “All I know is that we didn’t have to start working 7 days a week until the first year of this President’s term.”

Right there, in that instant, time stopped and I froze the scene.  My time travel body swap was ready.

Our 20 trillion dollar economy is so large that no one president can impact it very much in one year, let alone two or three.  Whatever pain the owner was feeling came from the previous president.  And that even assumes the president truly has much influence over the economy anyway.

But as people, as humans, we’re not geared that way.  We like to look at our local gods, whether they are good or evil, and blame them.  Whether Obama likes it or not, most people deify him – and not always in a good way.  Ultra conservatives give him credit for destroying our future, our way of life, and the Constitution.  Pretty good for a guy who’s limited to running the executive branch and vetoing the occasional bill.

As a nation, as intelligent adults, we should be smarter than to deify anyone.  We should know by now that the economy is large and complex.  That policies put in place 5 years, 10 year, even 50 years earlier could be impacting us today.  We shouldn’t be measuring our pleasure and our pain by the year of someone’s reign.

Yet here was an American, doing just that.

Body swap:  Stu becomes Japanese.

Did you know the Japanese still have an emperor?  In fact, they claim they’ve had a continuous line of emperors since 700 years before the common era (BCE).

But what’s even more fun is that we can stick Stu into a Japanese body, and get him to say the exact same thing.  Because many Japanese measure life events in terms of their current emperor’s reign.

Stu could say something like “Business was terrible in the first year of the Chrysanthemum Throne (1989).”  Or, “The first decade of the Chrysanthemum Emperor was all recession.”

Many Japanese remember their birthdays or anniversaries based on the emperor’s reign.  How quaint.  Are they also blaming the emperor for what is good or bad?  Perhaps.  But the very fact that they mark time based on a celebrity instead of a more objective system says something in itself.

Time swap:  Stu becomes Egyptian

In that next moment, I can take Stu and put him into the desert sun of the upper Nile.  Pharaoh Sesostris III has undertaking great tasks to unite many separate states into a greater Egyptian empire.  It’s 2,000 years BCE.  The pyramids aren’t quite yet built, but paper and mathematics are well on their way.  Meanwhile, most of humanity is still running around in skins.

And what do we find Stu the farmer doing back in the days of Sesostris?  According to written records, we know that his harvest, his battles, and his marriages and births are all being recorded based on the year of Sesostris’s reign.  In year one I got married.  In year two we gave birth to a son.  In year three the harvest was good, and so on.

Time swap, body swap: Returning to the present.

So, I smiled at Stu and Pete.  I may not agree with their politics, but in that instant I was able to watch Stu become a modern Japanese, and then an ancient Egyptian.  As far as I can tell, he’s none the wiser.

 

But is humanity?

 

 

Yoga in Space

I love things that go fast.  Cars.  Jets.  Spaceships.

Nothing goes as fast as a spacecraft heading out to the stars.  There’s something that excites my soul when I look up into the night sky and think that someday, our children may live among the stars.

There’s a problem with that.  In fact, there’s lots of problems, most of which have to do with our attitude.  But there’s one problem in particular that has lots of medical types worried.

People don’t do well living in space.  Who knew?

That’s the point.  No one could know.  No one has ever tried living in space before.  Everyone who goes up is doing an experiment on their own body.  The people who live up there for months at a time are at the most extreme.

When doctors examine these “long-timers” they find that they have lost bone and muscle.  They go soft.

So far the solution has been bicycles and other aerobic type equipment.  In the movies you see big circular rooms where people run in artificial gravity.  The problem with all of these solutions is that they require fancy equipment that weighs a lot.  The biggest problem is that none of those conventional exercises can address everything our bodies need: strength, stretching, flexibility, coordination, balance, control, all tied to our breath.

The only exercise that tackles all of these components is yoga.  And here’s the surprise.  You don’t need gravity to yoga!

I’ve been thinking about this a long time.  Yes, my head is constantly in the clouds, but that’s how I deal with all the troubles we get into down here in the dirt.  So every time I do a down dog, I’m thinking about how I’d do the same thing in zero gee.  And I’ve finally got it licked.

Believe it or not, we take gravity for granted.  You can’t do that if you live in space.  We need it to keep our bodies healthy.  And yoga can help.  The trick is to realize that yoga is really about the balance of forces.  And space travel is all about understanding the balance of force.

Like our mat, or the blocks, or blanket, or even a mirror, gravity is another tool we take into our yoga practice.

If you are a true yoga minimalist who doesn’t believe in tools, good luck!  Your body is a tool.  The ground is a tool.  And gravity is a tool.  You need all of these.

In space, we’ll have a set of tools unique to practicing yoga in zero gee.  And those tools will keep our future space travelers healthy and balanced for the many adventures yet to come.  Those tools won’t take up much room, or much weight.  Yoga can even be done at any time, not just during an authorized exercise break.

Yes, the next time you watch a space travel show, think about how they will stay healthy.  They probably won’t be running in circles or riding a stationary bike.  My guess is that they’ll be doing a half-moon, as they travel to the moon.

Yoga.  Not just for earthlings.

 

Planetary Family

Have you seen the latest pics from Pluto?

AWESOME!

Mountains made of ice floating in seas of nitrogen.

Volcanoes?  Two, and counting!

Not just one moon, but four!

Not bad for a teeny world that used to be on everyone’s “A” list for planetary parties.

“Huh?” you say?  “Used to be?  What happened?”

Did tiny Pluto commit some kind of party faux pas causing astronomers to send it back to “the hood?”  The Kuiper belt hood, that is.

According to astronomy’s poster child, Neil “8 planets or bust” deGrasse Tyson, Pluto is “just” an example of a Kuiper belt object.  Therefore it shouldn’t rise to the exalted status of a “planet.”

Horror.  Shock.

Millions of school children have learned our solar system’s family of planets number nine since lowly Pluto was plucked off packed plates about a hundred years ago.

Nine!  Mercury, Venus, Earth, Mars, Jupiter, Saturn, Uranus, Neptune.

And Pluto.

What happened?

Science happened.

Astronomers begged for, and built, bigger better telescopes with which to watch the wondrous heavens.

What did they find?

Stuff.  Lots of stuff.  In fact, they found so much stuff simply floating around in our own solar system that they were having trouble keeping track of it all.

That’s where Pluto got into trouble.

Pluto lives next to the Kuiper belt.  It’s a place where lots of other objects are floating about the sun.  Should all of those objects be “planets?”

In the smoke-filled back rooms of the International Astronomical Union, those power brokers to the stars determined that Pluto was too close to the Kuiper belt for us to trust.  Therefore, like the mafia, they decided to, … … … …, erase it.

“Pluto,” they said, “Pluto, you are dead to us.”

As the popular face of those anonymous power brokers, Dr. Tyson gives us their excuses.  Here’s the best one.

Planet is an arbitrary term.  Lots of things orbit the sun.  Asteroids between Mars and Jupiter, numbering in the millions.  The Kuiper belt.  The Oort cloud.  And all the stuff we shoot up there as well.

What about our own moon?  Or the two moons of Mars?  Should they also be planets?  Where would the madness end?

Astronomers got so confused that they said, “Enough!”  Planets are going to be only these 8, and therefore, Pluto is GONE!

Yes, Dr. T, it’s a good reason.  Yes, being a planet is rather arbitrary.  So, either refine the definition, or ignore it.  That’s logic.  That’s science.

That’s crap.

Dr. Tyson’s reason is the best reason why Pluto should be reinstated as a planet.  Our moon, the asteroids, the rest of the Kuiper belt, they aren’t planets because of one simple reason.

Family.

You read me right.  Family.

Being a planet has nothing to do with your size, age, or looks.  You’re a planet because we care.  That’s right.  Us humans care about you.  That’s all it takes.

Like a real family, it’s something you can be born into.  You can marry into.  You can be adopted.  Or maybe you’re a really really good friend who absolutely has to be at all the family events.  Because that’s what family is all about.  It our way of saying, “we care.”

Yes, we care about Pluto.  It’s got a relatively humongous moon!  Super-complex orbits!  Crazy weird and young surface features!

I suggest that we mount an all-out frontal attack on the IAU and their pretty boy Neal to get Pluto back in the fam.

And if they know what’s good for them, they’ll listen.  After all, remember how many years paleontologists tried to get rid of “brontosaurus?”

Guess what?

She’s baaaaack!

 

Boo. You.

Boo!

Not scared?  You will be, by the end of this story.

YOU should be scared because this is all about you.  It’s all about WHO YOU ARE.

You see, once you know who you are, you will also know who you aren’t.

Let’s start off easy.  And since this is Halloween, let’s start off imagining that you are chained to a classic rack of the Inquisition.  Scared yet?

First off, as your Inquisitor, I will clip your long fingernails.  Now I’ll give you a nice manicure.  Look at those fingernail clippings.  Are they you?  Are you they?

Of course not!  You are not your fingernail clippings!  You don’t care if they go or come, do you?  And look at how nice your fingernails look!

Is the nail polish dry?  Good.  Let’s go to step two.  I’m now pulling out all your fingernails.  The whole thing.  Don’t worry.  It won’t hurt.  Much.  I’ll wait for the crying to stop before we continue.

Now, here are your fingernails in a box.  Here are your fingers, without any nails.  A bit bloody, but that will heal.  Are YOU still YOU?  Probably.  People will recognize you.  You can sign your name on checks and play with your smart phone.

Can you guess what step three is?  Step four?  Do I need to elaborate?  I hope not.  If I remove your hands, your feet, your arms, your legs, and so on, when do you stop being you?  If you were to be deprived of everything except your brain, and if we knew how to keep your brain alive and even still be able to communicate with you, would that be you?

A story was written a long time ago about this very sort of thought experiment, called “Johnny got his gun.”  It was meant to be a statement against war, but it serves equally well as a question about where YOU end, and the rest of your body begins.

The next time you’re clipping your fingernails, think about what would happen if the nail clippers suddenly became possessed and began clipping away at your body, out of control.  At what point would they have stopped clipping body, and started clipping you?

Boo!

 

Extreme Fliers

I’m here at Oshkosh, Wisconsin, enjoying the world’s largest general aviation extravaganza.  The smell of jet A and 100 LL (low-lead) in the morning air, the gentle roar of piston and turbine, and the sight of man-made objects defying gravity is something I’ll never get tired of.

For many people, everything associated with aviation is scary, almost unholy.  Money spent for aviation is unnecessary.

What these people don’t fully realize is that it is only by pushing the envelope of human experience do we learn new technologies that can help everyone.  For instance, seat-belts and anti-lock brakes are two easy examples of aviation innovations that the rest of us use every day.

Here’s another innovation that we might appreciate years from now.  A group of aviation enthusiasts at Purdue is working with quadriplegics, paraplegics, and others who have been disabled in order to teach them to fly.  And so far, they have fledged 40 people into the skies.

Why is the work of Able Flight and the Purdue Aviation Technology Department important?  Because it pushes our knowledge and technology to the limits.  It does the seemingly impossible and makes it possible.  And in so doing, they may learn something that can help others, or perhaps even you and me.

So, the next time you see a child playing with a model airplane, or a youngster taking their first flight, encourage them.  After all, they might help the rest of us in unexpected ways.  Now excuse me, I’ve gotta fly!