I didn’t think it possible, but I found another girlfriend. The old one was super smart, incredibly observant, and extremely insightful. But there are times when that razor-sharp intellect can try a guy, especially on those nights I want to sit back and chillax.
Jane is intense. You can’t totally relax around her, because that brain of her is always going a million miles a minute. My friend calls it having a monkey mind. Jane’s brain isn’t out of control, it’s just that it’s always active, piercing, probing.
By the way, if you’re looking for a date, she’s available, and open to any gender. Check her out on tindr or match. Search for “Jane Austen.”
I’ll never forget her, but I’ve moved on. Now I’ve discovered Emily. Emily is sweet, unaffected, shy to the point of being diagnosed clinically catatonic. Seriously.
But her depth of feeling! When I spend enough time with her, not pushing, not asking anything, just sitting with some tea, or going for a walk and not even holding hands, sometimes, she’ll open up. The emotional intensity is pure, unadulterated power. I don’t THINK I’m alive when I’m with Emily, I FEEL alive.
The other day we were alone, together but not really, wandering the woods while a good distance apart. At one point I was looking straight up when a flock of geese flew overhead in formation, their standard “V.” I must have moved my lips and pointing finger as I was counting them. Counting is something I like to do, it relaxes me, and I’m a rather quantitative guy.
I felt a soft hand on my shoulder, so soft that I barely noticed. When I realized it was her, I touched it, gently. She removed her hand, and I turned to look at her. She looked away and said …
It’s all I have to bring today —
This, and my heart beside —
This, and my heart, and all the fields —
And all the meadows wide —
Be sure you count — should I forget
Some one the sum could tell —
This, and my heart, and all the Bees
Which in the Clover dwell.
I haven’t counted in her presence — since.