Seriously, dating can be for both Fun and Profit.
How can I be serious about something I haven’t done for so long?
I choose to be serious. I also choose to be funny. It helps the medicine go down.
Hearing about dating disasters from my single parent neighbors, reading about direct accounts on social media, and seeing all the crazy dating services available tells me that the current dating world is way crazier than it was 30 years ago.
That’s too bad, because dating can be fun.
There was a time, you see, when dating had a few extra rules. Rather than restricting us, the rules helped make things go easier.
This is going to sound fuddy-duddy, but one of the rules was that the man pays for the date. All of it. He also was in charge of thinking it through.
Feminists will flounder on this one, but hear me out Ladies.
The woman has far more to lose in the short run. She’s got the biological clock. She’s got the high standards society has set regarding appearance. She’s got the bigger up front investment in clothing and accessories. And she’s got an economic disadvantage in that her pay rates are usually lower than a man’s.
What does this rule get her?
She gets to see a lot more of HIS character. How does he pay? How does he tip? How considerate was his plans? What were his plans, were they things that you like, or places and food you’d rather never see again? Were all his actions respectful, or did he treat you like a “regular guy” straight out of the gate? Is he willing to travel great distances to see you?
Ladies, I’m sure you get the point. In general, you are way smarter than he is. I urge you to reinstate the rule.
Guys, there’s something in this for you, too. You see, as a guy, I know of what I speak.
Let’s face it, you want to take her out because she’s, well, she’s got it.
Making you do all the work, making you spend all the money; that sounds cruel, doesn’t it? You’re thinking to yourself, all this money, all this work, is it really worth it? After all, almost all of you are just as broke as her.
I’m asking you to step back a moment and look at the older men around you. There are those who found the right woman, and those who haven’t. Which group do you want to be a part of 40 years from now?
Being the perfect gentleman gets you a great look into her character as well. You’re in the planning stage, did she drop you some gentle hints? (Think hard on this one. Women are famous for dropping hints that guys can’t see.) Was she ready at the time you set to meet? When you open doors for her, does she say thank you? Did she appreciate the places and food you made available, or did she register her disappointment? Did she help the conversation along, or talk the entire time?
Gentlemen, I know this all sounds fairly complex, but here’s the deal. Getting what you want as cheaply as possible just doesn’t pay off in the long run. Look at your divorced friends and see how much it’s costing them today.
Start thinking about romance like an investment, a business proposition. You want dividends to increase over time. You want your business to grow, and maybe even have spin-offs.
So start thinking long-term. Start thinking quality. And start thinking about bringing back some of the old rules.
Let me know if you want to hear more. I’m tired of hearing my neighbor whine.