You’re young, beautiful, smart, and alone. On top of that you are oh-so-sexy. What do you do?
You dress the part. Your body moves the part. You hang out with like-minded friends at parties and clubs and play the part.
As an independent being, you have a choice. Those who choose not to play are labeled as outcasts and ridiculed, although not as much as they used to. Nerds, techies, 4-eyes and bookworms are some of the derogatory terms we used to hear for these “wallflowers.”
The problem for you today is that you ARE alone. You ARE young, and beautiful, and sexy, and you are programmed to look for a companion. It’s alright, this is something you shouldn’t fight. You can win, but at what cost? Unless you understand why, and the consequences, you should enjoy the experience.
“What?,” you say, “Shouldn’t fight? Why not?”
Because, I say, you are fighting Mother Nature. And Nature never loses. We are biological beings, and it is in our nature to find a companion and create a new being. That’s how a species survives.
“Fine,” you retort. “I’ll deal with a companion. But I go to parties, I go to clubs, and I meet people. But they all turn out to be jerks!”
The reason they are jerks is because they are acting according to their own personal rules of behavior, not yours, and not according to an over-arching set of social rules.
If we all had a blueprint of behaviors that were expected of us when courting the opposite sex (or the same sex for that matter!), then finding a suitable companion would be relatively easy. We don’t.
That blueprint of behaviors is what we call culture. We now live in an era where culture has become blurred. It’s just as acceptable for a young woman to ask a man for a date, or for casual sex today as it is for a man to do the same thing. For my own part, I grew up with the mentality that it was my duty and privilege to “court” a woman, respecting her dignity, and always (as much as possible) subjecting my will to hers.
How do you know when you meet a jerk? When he crosses the line.